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Sydney, NSW, Australia
Photographer. Writer. 45yo Indo-Fijian Australian. Glam Feminist. Coconuts.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

The Fuschia's So Bright...

..I gotta wear shades! 
Spent the most awesome day with two of the most awesome young women I have the privilege of knowing and the honour of calling friend.  These two have futures' so bright... you... know the rest J... 

That's a pretty bright ensemble I had on today.  Didn't attract much attention at all... HA!

We spent the day trawling my favourite markets in Rozelle and lunching and laughing! That's Karen in the middle and Basilia on the right (and me with a most stupid expression I can only assume is supposed to be a kiss?) and we're looking into a mirror!  Fantastic photo yeah?  Except for that stupid expression...

Karen (below left) is the designer of Zippora, an emerging designer label that is, in my not so humble opinion, one of the most exciting new labels around today.  I am in awe-doration of Karen's beautiful, generous, glowing self and soul and her skill and talent. 
I have seen Karen create from scratch and it's crazymagic!  One day she will be sewing little gathered circlets and the next day, it's a dress! She's wearing one of her creations here, a brilliantly cut, detailed, buttery soft leather jacket that is the envy of all who see it and don't have it! 

Basilia is perennially lovely, a multi-tasking genius with the most infectious smile!  Bas has a blog, is a fashion stylist, does PR and retail for Karen and is one of the few stylists around who actually look like they're worthy of styling others!'s a bug of mine... we work with a lot of stylists who simply do not represent what they purport to do.  In a world (industry wise and otherwise) predominantly based on surface impression, surely stylists should be right up there personal-style wise?  
Anyway... Bas has super personal style, colourful, quirky and trendy with her own signature stamps. Just like her personality.

♥ Karen and Basilia ♥

Through the looking glass...

Just one thing... I truly do feel honoured to be friends with my friends and loved by those I love... it is gratitude without being grateful.  "being grateful" implies a lack of self-esteem and I'm sure you can see that is not something I lack.  Haters may say there's an overflow and to them I say... why the hell not?

I am exceptionally blessed to have such incredible people in my life... I have been told that like attracts like and that is very humbling because it's a cycle, you know?  From which you constantly learn and grow.
My beautiful, most wonderful husband, my soul friends, my colleagues, my children... I am better person just by association.  A greater person through growth.

...and I have mentioned this before... I love having younger friends!  Not because they make me feel young.  Again, no help required thanks. 

The funny thing is, even though I have close relationships with my children, I don't wish to be their close friend...that's not how it works for me... I'm their mother, their very close, trusted and compassionate mother (so I get told) -who sometimes gets told things she really wishes they had kept to themselves- but their mother, not their friend...
Parents are their childrens safety nets.  Friends are each others rock... do you understand? 

I'm not saying it's not right to be best friends with your child/children, it's just not right for me... because it may puzzle some of you as to why I don't 'hang' with my daughter, who is around the same age as my younger friends... we do, we 'hang' as much as possible, we loved trawling markets together, watching shows, etc but she lives with her friends now and when she has time to 'hang'... we like having her come home, in our cocoon, where she can be a little girl again as well as a young woman...

Gosh.  This is a looooong post.  And it may be coming across a bit 'wrong'... like I'm gloating that I have younger friends, look how cool I am!  No!  I have many

What i'm trying to say that even though I am conscious of our age differences and that I may be seen as some sort of a 'role model'* by my younger friends, with them, because they are my friends, there is an equality that can never be present in a parent-child relationship. Friends inspire each other.  Friends learn from each other.

That's not to say I don't learn from my children.  I do.  I have mentioned before that my children gave birth to the unselfish me.
...but parents have a duty of care towards their children and one of the duties is to, at all times, make them feel secure and safe in the world even if the parents themselves are not feeling safe and secure.  Friends are privy to those feelings.  And even moments of [my perceived] weakness.

eg. and a bad eg. at that!  I would NEVER dream of being the slightest bit tipsy in front of my children... but friends... ahhhh fun times! 
I'm also pretty open about sex and sexuality but as you can imagine... I'm more open with my friends than i would be with my children!!  I can share personal experiences that may be of some help but no way in hell could I share things like that with my children!!! 

A really lovely effect of this growing up thing we all do... the childrens friends, as they grow older, all of a sudden we can relate to each other as equal, particularly the girls/young women... I love this transition!

*I do not like this term nor its purpose.  I don't believe in role models.  When it comes to paths... we perambulate, not emulate...

Mannn I need my own Dr Phil style show...
Anyway...back to why i love [also] having younger friends... it's wonderful to see their stories and energy and how dynamic they all are* and being a part of their growth without the responsibility of the guidance of that growth and traveling alongside them on their paths and sharing the sucesses and the 'stuckcesses'... yet knowing they have all these amazing years ahead of them, at their ages it may all seem so far away but on my side, these years just go by so fast...

Of course you know that I believe that it all starts again at 40... and just gets better and better... and I love being able to show them this.   Youth may be wasted on the young but it's age that creates youthfulness. 

...that future's so bright...

Bas and her Bally find!

*these friends of mine, here and here, the one in the middle, K, is studying Mechanical Engineering and with a sideline in fashion! and T is studing Honours in Anthropology!  Both are just exemplary beings in every which way... and my beautiful friend Meagan who is just such a dynamo and such a sexy, gentle soul!  These young women are all in their early to mid twenties, except Bas who is only 19!


Under Urooba's Umbrella! said...


I am swooning.

Tanvi said...

Your friends are as wonderful as you ... the energy is oozing out of the pictures ... And I think I love having 'older' friends 'coz most times girls my age are just too dumb for me ... with few exceptions.

Also, I like maintaining my original relationships with people ... like my parents are my parents, brother is brother, husband is husband and friends are friends. We all can share 'friendly' moments together but each relationship has its own characteristics which do not over lap for me. And that is GOOD thing I feel. There is a reason why those names where gives to those relationships :P

But the romantic in me loves these lines from an old hindi songPyar ko pyar hee rahne do koi naam na do. ... Haath se choo ke isse rishton ka ilzaam na do. Sirf ehsaas hai yeh, rooh se mehsoos karo. Pyar ko pyar hi rehne do, koi naam na do

I am sure I have written an essay by now?

P.S. And THOSE color riot is the only kinda riot that should exist! :)

Terri said...

Your outfit for the day is so eye-popping. I know that I would turn and look on the street. Agree with you that many of the stylists I have seen in photographs hardly seem worthy of the term. Also agree about the type of relationship one needs to maintain with their children even when the "child" is now an adult. It is a respect issue, but like you I have befriended many of my younger, former students.

Polka Princess said...

I guess I'm on the same boat with you regarding the "Mother-not-best friend" thingie! I mean, my mother will never be my best friend.....& I'll never be my daughters' - coz every relationship has it's own place in life & it's own characteristics. If all relationships could be rolled into one, then we wouldn't have needed all these people in our lives......right? (I hope I made some sense!!) Your friends may be younger to you....but you all look perfectly happy & at ease together.....the vitality is almost tangible! :)

P.S.: I not only enjoyed reading the post, but equally enjoyed reading Tanvi's comment, et all! :))

Lee Oliveira said...

I love Rozellle's market..
Full of stylish and vibrant people.
Great shots Dusk
Lee x

sacramento said...

My dear friend I am so glad to come back to your beauty and wisdom.
Those colours are just so me.

Vix said...

You all look so perfect together, you can feel the good vibes radiating from the wonderful photographs. You look absolutely gorgeous, pouty face or not.
No words of wisdom, I only have friends, no mother, no children. x

Mulika Ojikutu-Harnett said...

You are Love, beautiful one. With a grateful spirit should we engage with Life. Grace, Wonder (new eyes) and Goodness is something you show to us through your writing dusk. And for the haters, we must be kind as they do not know as much as they should...

M xx

p.s you look POW!

p.p.s I am soooo going to be appropriating the AMAZING post title if it is alright with you ;)

Veshoevius said...

Lovely insightful post! Orange and hot pink are a match made in heaven - wonderful photos and you look amazing as always.

Leia said...

I don't think you need to justify the friendships that you have! I don't even think about age in my relationships with people. My husband is 10 years older than me, which many people find weird. I can have an equally good time 'hanging' with a 15-yr-old girl, friends my own age, my mother, my grandmother, my aunts, friends who are in their 30s or 40s or 50s. I don't care about age, I care about personality and how well we 'gel'! And though I do think there are certain boundaries - like sex, for example - I do have a friendly relationship with a lot of my family members, including my mother. It was different when I was a child, but now we're quite open with each other, with some notable exceptions of course.


La Dama said...

You radiant love in all you do.
such a powerful woman you are. young friends always bring my energies high.
your friends are lovely inteligent beauties.

Penny Dreadful said...

I think it is wise to have friends that are both younger and older than you, it widens your world view. And why discriminate friendships based on age, or any other ism?

Lush pink trousers btw ;) x

Pop Champagne said...

those are such cute pictures and looks like you all had a fun time! love the pop of color in them :D

♥ joei said...

I've been going gaga over neon and bright colors, too! Love your ensemble! :)

Definitely, Maybe

Taj Acosta said...

I neeeed those sunglasses! lol. Those are too glam for words dear. And I love your photos of your dear friends, the lovely energy transpires! xo -Taj

suruchi said...

i looooooooooove that stupid is so sweetly natural and have friends like that!sigh!

the energy here is infectious:-)